Its getting to me. As I inch towards the 100th day of working on my own. The home office is turning out to be not so exciting and I find ways to escape into the world outside.
It was all fine till the time we were on our own, just the husband, baby and me. Then it was all ok. Atleast sort of. There were still the endless bells that would usher in the unwelcome entourage of maids, presswalas, courier guys, electricians, grocery delivery men. But it was largely peaceful, controlled and work was forefront.
Now with the in-laws at home and the endless entourage of relatives pouring in, its very very different.
Firstly, there is the too many pots clanging together idiom at play, with endless discussions on the smallest of issues which I am not entirely at ease with.
Picture this – To a relatively simple question “What should we make for Dinner?” a 45 minute discussion ensues on the vegetable to be cooked, the way it has to be cooked, the spices used to cook it, the tenderness it needs to be cooked till, heck, even the vessel it needs to be cooked in!
At the 34th minute, I begin to lose my patience and exit the discussion with ‘please get anything you want cooked and I’ll be fine with it”. But that somehow never manages to end the discussion.
That’s followed by, “But A (the husband) will not love it.. No? Let’s get something else made.” By which point, I’ve already begun tearing my hair off.
I’m not even going to go to the constant TV watching, buying unnecessary grocery, inviting people without letting me know….
The polite formality with which one lives when one is not living together with in-laws is falling flat on its face (at least for me) as we’re all living under a single ceiling. Need to get a grip on that!
Keeping everyone happy is impossible and not even a goal. All I seek is freedom for making these everyday mundane decisions or at least the freedom to opt out of them. Both of which seem to not be an option.
And all of this is taking my mind off work, which is just not acceptable.
Annoyed. Retrospectively amused but annoyed nevertheless. I’m not built for this stuff. Need a break from this stuff and need some inspiration.
Will definitely be working out of home this week.